


A Light Here Requires a Shadow There

by Vampiric_Charms



Series: Burns Most of All [22]
Category: The Silmarillion and other histories of Middle-Earth - J. R. R. Tolkien
Genre: Gen, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-08-13
Updated: 2016-08-13
Packaged: 2018-08-08 12:52:45
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,058
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7758574
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Vampiric_Charms/pseuds/Vampiric_Charms
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Mairon encounters Aulë in a place he did not expect to find him, and the two have a discussion about gems and smithing and many things quite left unsaid but still understood.</p>
            </blockquote>





	A Light Here Requires a Shadow There

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Naamah_Beherit](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Naamah_Beherit/gifts).



> This was written at the request of **Naamah_Beherit** , who wondered about Aulë discovering Mairon’s deceit as he leaves the sanctuary of the Valar for Melkor’s halls. This is kind of, sort of what she asked for? (I hope!) Only Mairon is involved directly in the discussion rather than Aulë alone.
> 
> Set very near the end of Mairon’s seduction now.
> 
> Enjoy!

Mairon walked swiftly through the residence halls, his soft-soled shoes quiet on the beautiful marble floors. Gentle light from the Lamps spilled in from the arched windows, his shadow creating quickly moving shapes through its stream as he made his way to his quarters. A piece of parchment, torn from his own sketchbook, was clutched in his hand, unfolded and refolded so often that the creases threatened to rip through the fibers holding the paper together.

There was nothing extraordinary about this slip of parchment, really. It had started as his own work, charcoal used to depict a faraway horizon when first he had ventured away with Melkor. Jagged mountains rose to meet the sky, biting through low clouds and covered with snow he was only glimpsing for the first time and, though he had complained of the cold as they approached, he had stood in awe of the sight nevertheless, requesting a respite in their journey long enough to put this quick sketch to paper lest he forget it.

Melkor had watched patiently as he drew in his small notebook but, after a moment, he had pried it from Mairon’s objecting hands before the image was even halfway formed and finished it himself. So this here, this charcoal rendition of the mountains in the far reaches only he and Melkor had ever set foot - this was drawn by Melkor’s own hand more than his own, and Mairon could not find himself able to part with it, now that he was returned. Not even for the time he spent in Aulë’s forge where he used to find so much more comfort.

He slipped the paper into the pocket of his tunic again, sliding a finger over the folded edge as though it had become some sort of talisman. 

That journey had been so long ago now. Only a handful of others had happened since then, even if Melkor’s visits into his own company had turned rather frequent in the time between. He was certain, however, it was only a matter of time before the excursions away became more and more common, and he could not deny a faint desire every time he left now of perhaps not returning, of staying in the wilds where he found himself so _free_.

He turned a corner, already thinking ahead to his evening plans. A book out under the trees, or maybe returning to the forge to finish a personal project he had taken up with some of the magnificent gems he had collected with Melkor.

But he paused, slowing his pace, when he saw the door to his rooms was already open.

Mairon continued his approach, confused and rather curious to see who had decided to invade his privacy - something only one being he could think of would ever dare to do.

It was not, however, Melkor standing inside his space, bathed in Lamplight. 

Aulë was standing in front of his tall bookshelf, a baffled expression on his exquisite, unearthly face. He was holding a small box in his hands, long fingers holding the lid open as he gazed inside at the uncut rubies held there.

Mairon paused again, watching for a moment as he reined in his surprise. Aulë had never been in his room, as far back as he could recall. Had never shown an interest in whatever personal life he led outside the forge, where he was most certainly Aulë’s favorite. He cast his eyes quickly about, taking in a few books pulled off the shelf and his workdesk in slight disarray. Aulë had been looking for something, and Mairon wondered with mild bother if he had found it. He schooled his face into a still calm and entered the room.

“My lord?” he asked softly, waiting in the doorway for Aulë to look up at him. “May I help you with something? Did you wish to see me?”

Aulë did not speak for a moment, their gazes held together in silence. Mairon lowered his eyes in a show of subservience, aware that even - or especially - outside the forge, Aulë was his master and a Vala to be shown utmost respect. He remained where he was as Aulë looked back at the rubies and shuffled them around in the small chest, removing one and holding it up to the light. Even unpolished and uncut, the piece was extraordinary, deep red and without flaw.

“Where did you come by this?” the Vala finally asked, his voice deep and laced with curiosity. Almost with concern, even if it was well hidden. He placed the ruby back and it clattered in with its fellows. “By all of these?”

“From the mines,” Mairon answered without a hint of lie. “I was quite lucky, I suppose, to have found such a rich vein. It was the only one I could see at the time; I took all it had. Perhaps Curumo will find another on his next trip?” he added with a smile, and Aulë almost seemed to relax with his soothing words. “I will tell him the tunnel where I found them, if he wishes.”

Aulë nodded, setting the chest back onto the shelf and drawing his hands away with some reluctance. “Yes. Yes, Mairon, that would be very kind of you. But…” And his face grew tense again, lines forming around his lips and eyes as he turned to find Mairon’s gaze again. “Why did you not put these gems with the others, for all of us to have access to? You know our guidelines for stones and ore found on our trips.”

Mairon lowered his eyes, quickly taking on the role of subservient Maia once more as he clasped his hands before him. “I do apologize, Master Aulë, truly I do. When I found those - ” He gestured to the box, which contained rubies not found in the mines shared by them all, but rather in a mountain very far from here. He had mined them with Melkor looking on, Melkor taking his hands as he pulled them from the earth, Melkor putting hot lips to his neck as he exclaimed on their beauty -

“When I found these,” he continued, aware that no heat was rising in his cheeks even if it was stirring in his chest, “I already knew what I wished to make with them. I needed every piece I collected, and I was worried if another took one for their own creation, I would not be able to finish my own.”

Aulë watched him curiously, his tale woven and quite believed. “And what piece is this, then? Have you started it yet?”

Mairon smiled again, allowing it to reach his eyes until they sparkled with the light of genuine invention Aulë was so accustomed to seeing around him. “A hair piece, woven strands of gold and copper to lay over one’s head, pin into the hair or tie into braids. I need a specific amount of gems - those rubies, Master Aulë, are so perfect! - to lie along the strands, to make them glitter. I had initially thought of pearls, or citrine, but then I found these…”

“And your idea came to life before your eyes,” Aulë finished for him, tone and posture both softening. Mairon nodded, and this was not a lie at all, but a truth he was rather excited about and made no effort to hide. “I can understand your desire in this, certainly. But why hide these from _me_?” 

“I was not aware I _was_ hiding them from you, my lord,” Mairon murmured, lowering his head with his words, “and for that I do apologize. I was merely holding onto them myself until I found time to begin my project.” 

Aulë nodded, letting out a soft sigh as he gazed at Mairon still standing in the doorway. “I have been worried about you, lad,” he admitted gently, taking a step forward. “You have been so distracted lately, and I’ve feared - ” But he did not finish that sentence, instead trying a different tact as he swept his kind golden eyes over the room. 

Mairon felt a surge of love for him deep in his chest, admiration that used to verge on worship when he was still so young and fresh, and the feeling quickly swooped low in his stomach to settle into an illness that gripped relentlessly for several seconds. For the first time since this began, he was unsure of his steps, unsure of his footing and what he was setting out to do. He thought of Melkor, his deep blue eyes and chiseled face staring back at him with - it wasn’t _love_ , not yet, but something deep and sure and real - and he swallowed.

Aulë looked at him again with a gentle smile, his gaze filled with his own assured affection, unaware of the emotions swirling so swiftly through Mairon’s mind. “It has been far too long since we have worked together in the forge, child, would you like to come back for a while and help me with my newest creation? I know you have finished your work for the day, but I could certainly use your talent.”

Mairon’s smile was genuine at the question, even if the sick sensation in his belly was still slow to fade. “Thank you, Master Aulë. I appreciate your offer very much, and would like to accept. When shall I join you?”

“I will be there for a while yet, once I leave you here. Come whenever you wish.” 

But then Mairon felt it, felt the light probing along the tendrils of energy that used to be so commonplace between them, as Aulë used his own energy to feel along against Mairon’s in reassurance that all was well. They had never formed a full bond, they both knew, a bond that allowed full access between thoughts and emotions and power - but there had always been an openness there, the gates to one soul freely allowing access to the other. That access was _gone_ , whether willingly or not between Aulë and Mairon as a side effect of the larger picture, and Mairon had no way to open another tether, not now that his soul had so fully given itself to Melkor’s, and Melkor’s to his own. 

He saw the moment those reaching tendrils of energy hit the closed walls against the shell around his soul, watched the flicker of fear across Aulë’s face come and go in the blink of an eye. But then, as quickly as it fell, the panic was gone and Aulë smiled once more, stepping forward to touch Mairon’s shoulder and initiating contact between them for the first time during the duration of their interaction. Mairon did not speak, did not show he had realized what had transpired, his expression pleased as his Vala graced him with nearness.

“Do come join me,” Aulë said softly, sincerely. “I would love to work with you, Mairon, and see your work in return. I look forward to it.” And he grinned gently, not one of sadness or fear or melancholy - but a real smile that reached his eyes, filled with kindness and love and hope.

Aulë turned to the door, beginning to walk out into the hall as their conversation came to an end. Mairon watched him go for only a moment before dashing into his room and taking the chest of rubies off the shelf. He stepped out into the hall, looking out after him.

“Master Aulë?” he called, voice light and free of all the tension he felt.

The Vala paused and looked back, somewhat surprised at being stopped in his departure. Mairon held up the box and they approached one another again. Mairon handed the chest to him, and Aulë took it, even more baffled. 

“Please, take these. As an apology for my accidental deceit.” Mairon lowered his gaze as Aulë drew away, box in hand. “I did not mean any harm to you, my lord. I never have.” 

“Oh, Mairon,” Aulë murmured, reaching out again to cup his cheek and turn his face up. Lamplight blazed across their features together, burning brightly and reflecting like gold in Aulë’s eyes as the Vala smiled at him like he was his own child. “Oh, Mairon, my lad, you have done nothing wrong.”

For only a moment, brief and fleeting, Mairon found salvation in his words.


End file.
